My Jungbub Journal – Thirteenth Day of Dong-ahn-guh (winter meditation retreat)
Passing the first test
He (the business owner who abused me) paid my invoice today and I started the service for his website.
I’m handing the conversation more comfortably. Since Dong-ahn-guh started, I try not to blame him. Just kept asking myself why I created this situation in my life. I know I can’t change his personality. Also, I don’t need to argue who is right and who is wrong. It’s meaningless.
Whenever I meditated, I ended up to this ultimate question: why did I create this situation (or invite him) in my life? There must be something I need to change or learn from the situation. Then, it will not repeat again.
He is a Latin businessman who loves UFC fighting. He reminds me of a boar. We had an intense situation which was triggered by a trivial issue. None of us yielded. We both pushed the situation like boars. (Actually, we are at the same age. Both of us were born in the year of the boar. Funny. I know what character the boar has.)
Also, I had a similar issue with my landlord. He has been mean to me. I decide not to allow him to treat me like that. I pushed him like a boar. Now he is avoiding me.
Anyhow, this pattern repeated for the last few months. That’s why I set it as my first intention for Dong-ahn-guh to change my pattern.
Law of Attraction: why am I attracting this situation in my life?
My focus is not to blame anybody. I don’t have a right to blame or criticize anyone. Instead, I only focus on asking why I attracted the situation in my life. It’s the law of attraction.
Birds of a feather flock together. If somebody reads this journal, he/she will laugh and say “all three of you are the same.” I know. That’s what I’m figuring out through Dong-ahn-guh meditation.
Then, how can I change it? First, I’m sure I can’t change them. It’s like they can’t change me. Hell no. Then, the only solution is to change myself. I’m working on it. I handled the email well and we started our business again. It’s a smooth process. Our landlord leaves us to live peacefully. He doesn’t bother us anymore. I don’t push him energetically anymore. This house is recovering balance and peace.
The change started. Yet, I know I will face a few more tests as Dong-ahn-guh going on. But whatever happens, if I stay focus on the fundamental question – why am I attracting this situation in my life? -, I will overcome all the challenges.